Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Where The Heart Is


I found this quote the other day and it's been nagging at me ever since. While it's set on a pretty background and, at first, seems like one of those possible "aha" messages, I'm no longer sure it's actually true, at least for me. Or am I missing something? (entirely possible)

So true.

So I thought I'd do one of my favourite things and make a list of where my mind goes when it wanders...I've been making up this list over the past few days, just to find out once and for all where my heart really lives...

So these are the places my mind goes when it wanders:

- to the next time I can eat, because these days I'm always hungry;
-  to my blog and wondering what I can write about next;
 - Edinburgh, Scotland, where my friend Kerry lives (I've never been there, and we've never met in person, but my mind still goes there to visit Kerry);
 - Facebook, when I haven't been able to get online for awhile...I wonder who's there, what they're doing, what they're saying, what I'm missing, and if I have more energy for my favourite games (they all require "energy");
- back in time, I go there to visit my family a lot these days;
- my grandchildren's house - I often wonder what they're doing, if they're missing us;
- Quin-Mo-Lac, where I spent 8 summers as a camp counsellor in my teen years; QML often comes to mind at this time of year;
- the beach in Maivellette in Nova Scotia, one of my mind's "go-to" places when it needs one;
- my mind wanders through my various lists, wondering what I've forgotten to write down, what I can do, pack, buy or tick off next;
- to a game I've been playing on Facebook, trying to mentally figure out how to move on to the next level (I've been stuck in Madagascar in one game for almost a year now!)
- to my closet, wandering what's the least amount of clothes I can take on our trip to China;
- and as soon as my mind wanders to China, it worries about the squat toilets;
- to my knees and what I can be doing to strengthen them - for those squat toilets!
- to the fridge, wondering what I can eat that won't put my sugar way up again.

Hmmm, that's quite the busy mind, isn't it! And I didn't even capture all of the wanderings...it's impossible to keep it grounded long enough to write it all down. And it's impossible to say with any certainty or conviction  that my heart lives in any or all of those places. But after keeping track over the past few days, I did notice the one "place" that my mind wanders to the most...to God, often, throughout the day, without warning, my mind constantly wanders off to His side, holds His hand, leans against His strong shoulder, sighs and then flits back to earth. Most times we never say a word, but it's enough. I just love the feel of His quiet Presence and calm reassurance...and I love knowing that He knows what (and who) is in my heart. Yes, there's a high possibility that my heart could want to live there in His Presence forever.

But after making these lists and pondering it over, as lovely as that picture and quote are, and as beautiful as many of those mind-treks are, I prefer to believe that my heart lives right here with me, wherever I am at any given moment. Yes, my mind likes to wander off and visit people and places and memories - the skies (and lovely beaches) of the imagination are endless!!

But ultimately, the place where my heart most wants to be is right here with me...home is where the heart is, and for me and my heart, I am home.

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